With all the problems the government shutdown has leveled upon the country, the silver lining is without question the fact that White Nationalists have agreed to pay for the border wall that will stretch from California to Texas.
“I feel like all the White Nationalists living today were born for this moment,” said Richard Spencer, leader of National Policy Institute, a white supremacist think tank, when contacted by The Satirical Post.
“We’ve been made out to look like racists in the press and it’s not fair. Sure we hate everyone who isn’t white. But why does that make us racists? Anyway, we felt that paying for the wall would be great for us because it will stop Mexicans from coming into our country, and it would save taxpayers $20 billion dollars. So it’s a win, win,” explained Mr. Spencer.
When asked how his members would be able to put together a $20 billion fund, Mr. Spencer responded, “Some of our members have agreed to stop playing video games in their mother’s basements and get jobs. Other members have agreed to ask for promotions. White Nationalists are going to become productive members of society in order to make this work. We might not have time to march with tiki torches anymore. We’ll see,” said Mr. Spencer.
Politicos aren’t sure how to interpret the pledge Mr. Spencer and his organization has made. Some believe it’s just a marketing ploy to soften their image while others believe they really do want to pay for the wall.
“It’s kinda scary to imagine all these white nationalists climbing the corporate ladder to pay for the wall, but if that’s what it takes for us to not have to pay for The Wall, then we’ll take it,” responded Sen. Chuck Schumer of New York.
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