IT'S OFFICIAL: Eric Trump Resigns in Solidarity with Donald Jr.

January 16, 2018

Who knew that just two days ago when Jared officially changed his last name to Trump, the Trump family would descend into chaos? The answer is no one.

 

At 8:00am EST, Eric Trump resigned from Trump Organization, supporting his elder brother who just yesterday resigned from Trump Organization in protest of his father accepting Jared as a true Trump.

 

Residents of Trump Tower and Trump properties all around the world are concerned that this family feud could effect their standard of living and are already looking for available apartments in buildings owned by the Kushner Companies.

 

In a fiery letter to his brother in-law, Jared Trump, Eric Trump outlined his grievances and laid out what the future holds for himself and his elder brother. See the full text of Eric's letter below.

Dear Jared,

 

You think you’re a Trump? Think again. Being a Trump isn’t about having five letters in your last name. Being a Trump isn’t about having a legal document or a driver’s license that says ‘Trump’. Being a true Trump is all about an attitude, a way of life. Being a true Trump begins with my father’s sperm, and you Jared, are not of my father’s sperm. You will never be a true Trump.

 

You’re not half the man Donald Jr is. Or me. So stop trying. I hope you’re happy that Don Jr. and I have resigned from Trump Organization. He and I are going to start a new company and it’s going to be much, much better than Trump Organization and Kushner Companies combined. What do you think about that?

 

Just because you get to spend all day with my father and Ivanka doesn’t mean you’re better than me. Just because you get to make decisions that effect the entire world and I only get to make decisions that effect Russian and Chinese money launderers doesn’t mean you’re better than me. A bum Trump will always be better than a princely Kushner.

 

Have you ever wondered why Ivanka didn’t take your name? Think on that for a lonely night.

 

Please tell my dad to call me. Thanks.

 

Eric Trump

 

 

 

 

 

 

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