BROWNSVILLE, TX - After declaring the military would begin patrolling the US/Mexico border, President Trump requested the Navy dispatch one of the country's premier carriers to the Rio Grande to act as a command center and launch point for air, land and sea missions.
But after only twelve hours the USS Essex found itself stuck on the northern bank of the river unable to navigate the narrow waterway.
President Trump immediately lashed out at the Rio Grande river for its role in stopping the USS Essex.
“I guess we know whose side the Rio Grande is on. SAD! The US has done so much for Rio Grande and this is how it treats us. NOT AGAIN!” the President Tweeted.
Mr. Trump has ordered a full investigation to see if the river bed was somehow altered by immigrants to sabotage US patrol efforts.
“Maybe each immigrant threw a handful of dirt into the river to make it more shallow. Maybe the Mexican government told them to do it. We don’t know. But if it turns out the Rio Grande took deliberate action against the United States, the president it prepared to deport the river," said Sarah Huckabee Sanders.
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